He spends time every day carefully browsing through profiles and looking for women who he feels share his same interests – beyond the dating site’s algorithm which promises to perform its own magic in matchmaking. I spent hours trying to create a profile that shows people what I’m really like. Sure, I get a lot of profile “views”, but no messages.
Maybe I’m just not really portraying myself very well in my profile or something. RD: Do you think the algorithm and the other tools the dating sites offer help at all? I mean, I like the fact that you can IM with people when they’re online if you want, but as far as the “matching algorithm” goes, I don’t think it really works very well.Like, OKCupid gives you a percentage of match or non-match you are with certain people.That was mostly because I transferred schools, but because we became friends first, we had a connection that drew us back together for a chance at something more.What we found out was that we had much, much more than friendship in store for us.It made me SO uncomfortable that guys so much older than me, older than most of my siblings (all of which are 8 years plus older than me), were sending me messages telling me that I was “hot”.
I am getting terribly uncomfortable just thinking about it.
By the time of this interview, she had already given up and moved on, finally discovering her future husband while visiting old friends at her alma mater. Ryan (RD): What year did you sign up with an online dating website and how long did you keep your account? RD: What were the majority of messages that you received from guys like? I got some commenting on my picture telling me how “hot” I was…how “good” I looked.
Anonymous Woman (AW): I can’t remember the exact year I signed up… Actually, now that I think about it, that was how most of the messages I got started.
This experience is best exemplified by my close friend who I will call Eric.
Eric has been using a couple of online dating websites off and on for the past year, with very little success.
RD: How long have you been using online dating websites? Most importantly is that she likes doing similar things that I do. Maybe they don’t like my pictures, or maybe I’m not being as nice as I feel I am in my messages.