There's often a tenacious will to heal themselves and grow, but no matter how much therapy they've tried or how many self-help books they read or support groups they joined, self-loathing remains entrenched and implacable.
This natural reflex to 'get it right' was implanted in you as a very small child, when you experienced difficult and confusing relational dynamics with your parent(s).You might also have observed troubling interactions between your folks, who struggled together a lot like Kids emulate their parents.Most importantly, though, seek His strength and His wisdom. “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.This is not a battle that can be won overnight, and the journey out can be marked even by physical pain, much like withdrawal. They want to dress like them, act like them, and mimic everything they do.
Think of little girls who get into Mommy's makeup and jewelry, and you have a stellar example of emulation. Nothing gets past 'em--and even when you think they're not paying attention, they absorb and integrate all of your words and behaviors~ it's a big part of why Borderlines spawn children with BPD traits.
Due to innate narcissism in all Borderlines, there's only enough space in this relationship for one personality to exist~ never two.
every Borderline who phones me for help, states: "I've done a lot of work on myself!
The Queenly Borderline may not rage at you like the BPD Witch~ but you will not escape her piercing disdain for you..
If you're ever unfortunate enough to get involved with one, you won't be permitted to have your own feelings and needs, unless they're simultaneously shared by and identical with your Borderline's.
As children they were routinely programmed to feel unlovable and undeserving of affection or care, so this is how they've learned to regard and treat themselves.